


The 3 year Anniversary

by UAs_Fics



Category: South Park
Genre: AO3 FB Challenge, Gen, One Shot, super hero AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-01-23
Packaged: 2019-03-08 15:24:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13461078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UAs_Fics/pseuds/UAs_Fics
Summary: Professor Chaos has an unexpected visitor in his lair.





	The 3 year Anniversary

**Author's Note:**

> For a writing Challenge from the Facebook Group called Archive of Our Own (AO3) Writers, to celebrate their 3 year anniversary as a group. Set in a Super Hero AU

Title: The 3 year Anniversary  
Summery: Professor Chaos has an unexpected visitor in his lair.   
Ships: N/A  
Rating: T for language  
Other: For a writing Challenge from the Facebook Group called Archive of Our Own (AO3) Writers, to celebrate their 3 year anniversary as a group. Set in a Super Hero AU

~~~~~~

The great Professor Chaos leaned back in his chair, his fingers tips tapping against each other. Truly, he was a genius! No other gadgeteer could ever, or would ever, come close to his level of intellect. He scanned over the blue print with a smirk. He'd like to see what those Freedom Pals think of something this good!

Chaos grabbed his steaming cup from the side table and sipped. He raised his eyebrows. A wide smile crossed his face.

"Man, mmm, this is some good cocoa," Chaos proclaimed. "Gotta remember to give my compliments to the chef. Actually, uh, better write that down." Chaos set the cup on the corner of his blueprints, inadvertently knocking his pencil off the table.

"Hamburgers!" He swore and fumbled to snatch it, but the pencil just brushed his fingertips before rolling to the floor. With a noisy sigh, he shoved his chair away from the table and dropped to his knees. He turn his head side to side, trying to locate the missing writing tool. Finally, he spotted it near the leg of a chest of drawers. With a sound of accomplishment, he crawled over towards it. 

Just as his hand went for it though, the pencil rolled away. Chaos furrowed his brows together. Pencils didn't usually do that, did they? He crawled close to it once again before making another try for it. And, once again, it rolled away. With a huff, he pounced at the pencil. 

This time, the pencil flew into the air above Chaos. The villain slammed into the chest of drawers. His vision doubled for a moment as his skull bounced around his helmet. He blinked hard a few times before setting his jaw. Pulling himself up with his ears still ringing, Chaos narrowed his eyes at the pencil which now floated a few inches above him.

The light from his work table hit the pencil just right, and Chaos knew that was the cause of this. A thin trail of dark purple smoke looped around the pencil then slithered down to the floor and into the shadows. 

"Oh, ha-ha, very funny." Chaos spun around. His cape flowed around him until he was tangled up for a moment. This action brought a chuckle from the shadows, confirmation on his intruder's identity.

He fixed his good eye on the deepest shadows in the corner of his study. After a moment of silence, the pencil clattered to the ground behind him. Chaos did not turn. Instead, he took three long steps towards the shadows. He raised his left hand then tapped a button on his glove with his right. A beam of light shot out of the disc in his palm, illuminating the corner.

"I knew it!" Chaos exclaimed.

Mysterion raised his hand to shade his face. "Don't let your head get too big, Professor. I let you find me." 

Chaos turned off the light and dropped his hands. Mysterion readjusted his hood before strolling over. With a flick of his wrist, he set a smoky shadow towards the fallen pencil. He made a fist, and the shadows pulled the pencil into his hands. He turned it over between his fingers a few times before flipping it into the air. Before Mysterion could pull it back, Chaos grabbed it from the air and pushed it behind his ear.

Mysterion rolled his eyes. He raised his fingers, as if he planned to take the pencil back with his powers, but instead shrugged. Of course he would not try that. No one would dare steal from Professor Chaos!

Instead, Mysertion held his hand flat and made a loose, dark ball with his powers. "You use to be scared of my powers. You cried the first time I used this on you." He stated.

"I was never scared of you. I only cried 'cause you made me trip, and I skinned my knee one good!" Chaos laughed at the memory. In fact, it was on _Chaos_ , himself, the first time Mysterion had ever used that strange power of his. During one of the villain's early schemes, when both of them were still only kids running around a small mountain town in Colorado, Chaos had been fleeing, his plan foiled, when Mysterion threw his hand out. 

Chaos smirked then remarked, "As I remember it, you were more scared than I was. Your voice shook; you were that scared." He remembered Mysterion even helping him up with trembling hands, babbling how he didn't mean to do that. How he didn't even know _what_ he did. How he was sorry and hoped that whatever that was didn't effect Chaos' immortal soul and if it did, he promised to fix it.

"You try being eleven and learning your even less human than you thought you were." Mysterion retorted. "Other dimensional puberty before actual puberty. It's fucking terrifying, believe me."

Chaos shrugged, but decided to let Mysterion win this round of banter. He crossed his arms and leaned against a bookshelf. "Anyway, what do I owe the pleasure of my archrival breaking into my lair--which is very illegal, might I add."

Mysterion walked past him to his work table. "So is building a doom's day weapon run by," he leaned down closer to the prints, "skim milk."

Chaos rushed over, snagging the blue prints away from Mysterion. As he did, the cup of cocoa he had left on the blueprint fell, much like the pencil before it. Mysterion jumped into action and grabbed the cup by the rim. He then moved his hand down to the handle and brought the cup to his nose. 

"Smells pretty good," he said.

"Tastes pretty good, too." Chaos replied. He jumped, remembering why he needed the pencil in the first place. Turning the blueprints over, he jotted down a note to himself about giving which ever minion made the cocoa a raise. 

A slurping sound made him raise his head back up.

"Not bad. Has that taste like a mom made it." Mysterion nodded, looking impressed. "You should give whatever minion made this a raise or something."

Chaos opened his mouth, about to tell Mysterion not to tell him what to do with his minions, when he stopped and narrowed his eyes. Mysterion might be a clever hero, but Professor Chaos was much more so!

"Nice try, but you didn't answer me before, Hero. What are you doing here? I haven't broken the law in weeks." 

Mysterion set the cup down. "It's the seventh, Chaos, the seventh of November. It's our anniversary."

Chaos reached into his pocket and produced his phone. Sure enough it was, in fact, November seventh. So that's why Mysterion was here. 

"The Anniversary of our first solo team up, without any other heroes or villains," Chaos slipped his phone back safely into his pocket. "Seems like just yesterday you needed my tinkering abilities to take down that drug ring. As I recall, you broke me out of jail, went against your team's orders, and nearly got yourself both incarcerated and incinerated." 

Mysterion winced briefly at when Chaos brought up the factory fire. To this day, Chaos still hadn't figure out how Mysterion escaped uninjured. Every time he'd ask, Mysterion would simply say "You should have been paying more attention, Professor." Chaos had long ago chalked it up as something he'd probably never get to know. 

Mysterion moved around the table so he was standing face to face with Chaos. They were about the same height now, with Chaos only holding a few inches over Mysterion. When they were teenagers, Chaos had shot up in height. For a few months, Mysterion had to crank his neck back to look Chaos in the eyes. Until Mysterion hit his own growth spurt and all returned to normal, that is.

Chaos crossed his arms and met Mysterion's eyes. Most of the other heroes got unnerved, if just for a moment, when he fixed his blind eye on them, but not this hero. Mysterion held his gaze, always, and usually it was Chaos who would look away first. Sometimes Chaos would feel a sinking feeling if he stared into Mysterion's haunted blue eyes for too long. they held a hypnotic feeling that only the eyes of someone who knew more than a human possibly should could hold. Maybe one day, he's risk losing himself and see what sort of otherworldly secrets he could steal for himself.

"Chaos...Butters," Mysterion began, breaking Chaos from his thoughts.

" _Leo_ ," Chaos corrected out of reflex. It still bothered him to no end that Mysterion knew his secret identity, but not the other way around. When Chaos demeaned to know how the hero found out, Mysterion only chortled and mentioned that Chaos wasn't 'that subtle' as a kid. Which, of course, was a lie. Professor Chaos had always jumped through countless hoops to make sure his double lives remained as separated and unknown to each other as possible.

"I'm sorry." Mysterion apologized. "Leo, please, take the offer I've made you for the last three years: Give up your life of crime, join Freedom Pals. You're only twenty five, you can turn your life around. History could remember you as a good guy." Mysterion stretched out his hand. 

Chaos eyed the gloved hand held out to him, then swatted it away. "Not a chance, Mysterion."

Mysterion groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I can't understand you. You do so much good in your civilian life, but continue to waste your potential with this villainy bullshit."

Chaos' eyes gleamed. He let out a barking laugh. "Don't you see, hero? That's the point!" He strolled past Mysterion to the bookshelf. He ran his fingers along the smooth wood, before reaching the shelf of knickknacks. He returned over and held out his hand.

Setting in his palm was a snow globe, from the Denver Zoo, it seemed. A few figurines of large animals were glued to the base. All of them looked out of their glass prison with blanket, lifeless stares. Chaos dragged his finger along the top of the globe. 

"Think of it like this. Pretend the world is a snow globe," Chaos held the globe up to Mysterion's face. "Now, pretend there was something shiny and valuable inside, like a gem or gold. Now normal super villains would do anything they can to break this globe open, to get the shiny thing inside, but not me."

"Not you?" Mysterion repeated.

"Nope, I don't care if I get the shiny inside, at least, not anymore. I've matured in my tastes. No, want I want to do is," Chaos gripped the snow globe on both sides and began top shake it. The fake snow swirled around like a blizzard inside the globe. Chaos then dropped it onto the table. It rolled on it's side before coming to a stop. 

"This! This is what I want! I want to shake everything up, Mysterion." He draped his arms around Mysterion's shoulders. "I want to see how I can mess up the world's plans for itself."

"And what does that have to do with your entrepreneur work, exactly? Or your company's programs to help the poor?" Mysterion asked as he pushed Chaos' arm off him. "How do those 'mess up' the world?"

"Simple, the world doesn't like it when those at the bottom get to the top," Chaos wagged a finger. "The big richy riches hate when the poor get money and knowledge, because it's a threat to their power. If I can help get those at the bottom raise to the top, think of how much trouble that'll cause!" He threw his head back and began to laugh. "Think of the chaos! Of the fights in ideology! Of the--"

"You are a terrible liar, Leo."

Chaos froze. "What?"

"You are a terrible liar." Mysterion repeated. "If you wanted to stir up that much trouble, then you'd just fix the lottery a few times so some poor people would win the millions or drop a few gold bars in some chump's mailbox. " Mysterion moved so he had Chaos pinned against the table with his arms boxing Chaos in on either side. "There is no reason you go through the trouble of bringing tutors into poor communities to teach kids, or give money to start up business, or build shelters for the abused. You want to help people, Leo. I know you do."

Chaos tried to think of a come back, but no matter how many times his mouth opened and shut, nothing came out. He felt his stomach twist into knots. He tried to keep his back straight so he was still the taller one between them, but just feeling Mysterion's eye burrow into him, made Chaos flinch and slouch down. 

Mysterion had him balls, and they both knew it. 

"...can't..." whispered Chaos finally.

"Can't what?" 

"I can't just stop being Professor Chaos!" The villain shouted. "Society failed me!" He put his hands on Mysterion's chest and shoved him back. "Society didn't help me when I needed it--not with my parents, not with my school, not with my friends, not ever! I can't just stop until I get my revenge on it for what it let happen to me!" Chaos grabbed the snow globe from the table and threw it against the ground.

Shards of glass scattered across the cement floor. The base of the globe lay in a puddle of fake snow filled water. A figurine from inside the globe--a hippo--had broken as well. It's head skidded across the floor and hit the toe of Mysterion's boot. Mysterion raised his boot and crushed the the cheap ceramic under his heel.

He grabbed hold of Chaos' shoulder hard enough that had Mysterion not been wearing gloves, his nails would have pierced Chaos' skin. 

"You think you're the only one society fucked up the ass? You're not!" Mysteroin snapped. "I grew up poor as fucking dirt. I barely got enough to eat. I wore hand-me-down until they were threadbare. I worked two jobs by the time I was sixteen, along with night lighting as a hero--with parents who were drunk more often than not! I suffered because society didn't give a rat's ass about me or my family, but instead of trying to get back at society, I'm trying to better it! You could too, if you got your head out of your ass!"

Chaos squirmed against Mysterion's grasp. Mysterion sighed after a moment and dropped his hand to his side. 

"Whatever. I don't know why I keep doing this." Mysterion shook his head. "My offer stands; it always will." Before Chaos could reply, Mysterion melted into the shadows. The window creaked open and a thin trail of smokey shadow crept out. Chaos watched the window close then fell to the floor, resting his head on his knees.

Mysterion was gone, and Chaos was alone.

 

~~~~

Days pasted, and Mysterion waited.

Every time he asked Chaos to which sides, the villain always came out with some big scheme to set the world awry, but as the days dragged into a week, nothing happened. No plots to replace the world's ocean with watermelon kiwi kool-aid. No break ins at any nuclear factories. Not so much as a peep from even the lowest Chaos minion.

It was on the sixteenth when Chaos finally showed his face.

Mysterion had foiled an attempted robbery at a gas station in the sleazier part of town. He tighten the rope around the criminal's wrists, making sure it was secure to the light pole. The police would probably have to cut the rope in half to get the knot undone, like usual.

Mysterion nodded to himself when he heard squeaking and felt something on his pant leg. He jumped back. A hamster dressed in a greenish cape and tin foil hat plopped onto the ground. Mysterion furrowed his brow before scooping the rodent up. 

It had been a very long time since he had seen this type of Chaos minion. Professor Chaos has long since retired his hamster brigade, or so Mysterion had thought. 

Mysterion stroked the hamster between its ears. The little creature blinked at him before scrambling down his body back to the ground. It scurried a few paces then stopped and turned back. 

It wanted him to follow.

Mysterion pursed his lips. He took a couple of backwards steps to stare down the street. He strained his eyes until he saw the flashing of red and blue lights in the distance. With a nod to himself and a threat at the tied up criminal, Mysterion followed the hamster. 

~~~~~

"Good job, lil' minion!" A voice complimented after The Chaos Hamster lead Myerstion down the streets and into an alleyway.

A figure crouched down and picked the hamster up. From the darkness, Chaos stepped out. He wore his civilian clothes now, a very fancy blue suit and an eye patch covering his foggy eye. He pulled open his front pocket enough for the the hamster to comfortably sit in and allowed the rodent to make itself at home. 

He took a breath then turned a friendly smile to Mysterion. "Heya there, Mysterion! How's your night been?"

Mysterion raised an eyebrow. "You're acting pretty cheery for a man in a dark alley."

Chaos chuckled. "Don't worry, I'm not doing anything wrong. I was at an event a few blocks away and heard through the grape vine that a certain shadow of justice was in the area."

"An event, with a trained hamster." Mysterion jabbed his finger at the moving animal in Chaos' pocket.

"'Therapy' animal." Chaos replied with air quotes. "Besides, that isn't what I wanted to talk to you about."

Chaos strode forward until he was a foot away from Mysterion. Mysterion tensed. He didn't think Chaos would try anything outside of his costume, but he moved enough to make sure the pistol at his hip hostler was visible. 

Chaos fiddled with the buttons on his suit jacket. "After you broke in on me a week ago, I started really taking a hard look at things." He raised his hand then asked, "Your shoulder. May I?" Mysterion nodded, hesitantly, and Chaos dropped his hand on the hero's shoulder. 

"Society is still broken, maybe it always will be. It outcasts people for petty reasons and let's innocent people get hurt without battling an eye. I still hate it, and I still would rather see it implode in a fiery torrent of entropy than anything else, but," Chaos squeezed Mysterion's shoulder, "well, darn it, I've come to realize that making that happen is a lot of hard work. Even if I spent my whole life time trying, I might not be able to do it. So I was thinking maybe destroying the world as revenge is like, I dunno, throwing a match at a glacier. It won't do squat."

Mysterion's eyes widen. He felt an uncharacteristically wide smile spread across his face. He had to hold back the urge to hop up and down like a child about to be given a present from a grandparent.

"So, what your saying is you're giving up on being a villain?" Mysteroin felt like his chest was going to explode in excitement. 

"I'm...considering it." Chaos replied. "I like being, well, chaotic. I like watching people run around confused, though, so I might not be all that good of a hero, but I might give bein' the good guy a chance--if the Freedom Pals will have me, that is."

"I mean, we keep Mosquito around, don't we?" Mysterion rubbed his mouth, trying to force the smile back. He failed miserably, but didn't really care.

Chaos covered his own smile with his free hand. He opened his mouth to speak but a ringing in his pocket cut him off before he could speak. Chaos slipped his phone from his front pocket. He sighed. 

"Golly, guess I'd better be getting back. It's late, and I'm needed at the event." 

"Of course," Mysterion took a step aside. "Get where you need to be. I'll even escort you, if you want." 

"No, no, but it's swell of you to offer." Chaos headed towards the opening of the alley. He paused a moment then said, "Before I go, I have a question."

He reached up and lifted his eye patch and met Mysterion's eyes'. Mysterion had always liked Chaos' eyes. Behind the veil of evil cunning was a still a shining innocence and optimism that had somehow remained against the rush of time. Sometime, he wished Chaos could hold his gaze like he use to back when they were kids, so he could try to steal a little of that nostalgic childlike feeling he had lost years back for himself.

"Alright. Shoot." Mysterion replied.

"Why are you so determined to help me. Why am I so important to you? What makes me different than your other villains? It can't be because we've been fighting since we were kids."

A chuckle escaped Mysterion's lips. "You won't buy it's because Netherborns are capricious with who they like, would you?"

A small blush colored Chaos' cheeks. "You like me? I mean--no, I won't believe that."

"Damn," Mysterion laughed once. "Well, the truth is we playing this little game of hero and villain together for a very long time and since the begining I sensed it. You are a bright soul. A bright soul shouldn't surround itself in darkness." Mysterion paused then rolled his eyes more dramatically than he needed to. "Wow, that sounds extremely corny. Pretend I didn't say that, will you, Leo?"

"Mysterion..." before Mysterion could react, Chaos swept him up into a bear hug, holding him close. "Call me 'Butters.'"

Mysterion stiffen. Physical contact when he had the mask on had always been punches and kicks. He didn't know how to react. 

_No, Mysterion doesn't know how to react,_ He corrected himself. _Kenny does._

Kenny raised his arms and wrapped them around Butters's shoulders, pulling him close. He pressed against Leo's neck and then dropped his faux gruff voice for a singular moment to whisper, "Maybe as celebration for three years a hero, I'll tell you _my_ real name." 

Butters gasped. He made a move like he was going to let go, but stopped and instead rested his head against Kenny's. "Really? You promise?"

"Yeah," Kenny squeezed Butters tightly, "I promise."

~~~

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note: Wow, I actually completed something for a challenge. Ten points, Michelle. Anyway, that facebook group this is for is pretty chill, so check it out sometimes if you have the chance!


End file.
